Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Let Us Be Thankful - Instilling Gratitude In Our Children

**Farm Hunting Update:  Not much to post today except that the girls and I are the packing ROCK STARS!!!  Check out our before and after pictures!!***

Before


After

Packing Rock Stars!!



Let Us Be Thankful - Instilling Gratitude In Our Children

If you are like most American families, you are looking forward to Thursday's Thanksgiving celebration!  Thanksgiving is a time in which we share a meal...usually a rather LARGE one...with our family and friends and spend time being thankful for all that we have.  Most of us take time to think back over the past year and reflect on everything we have to be thankful for.

Thanksgiving is a great holiday full of fun traditions and has a nice motive behind it, but what about the other 364 days of the year?  What if you don't have family to celebrate with or a home to celebrate in?  Thankfulness always comes easier when our blessings are abundant, but what about when they are not? 

1 Thessalonians 5:18 tells us to "give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."  Though we should always be thankful for every blessing that the Lord has given us, whether that is a trip to Disney World or a walk in the park, our thankfulness should not stem from these things.  As Psalm 107:8 says, "Oh, that men would give thanks to the LORD for His goodness, And for His wonderful works to the children of men!" (italics added) This is not dependant on our "stuff."

How do we, as parents, teach our children to, like the scripture says above, give thanks for His goodness and the works He does in others as opposed to just our possessions and circumstances?

Though our family has not mastered it, these are some things that have helped us:

Pray:  This will always be my number one tip in any parenting adventure!  We may not always know the perfect way to cultivate our children for God's plan, but He does!!  Just ask :)

Demonstrate Thankfulness:  Yuppers, this means you!!  Live your own life in accordance with the scripture that calls us to give thanks in all circumstances.  Is it hard?  Yes.  But also remember scripture  tells us in Philippians 4:13 that "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."  So come on!! You can do it!!

Pray Before Meals:  I know that some of you consider this cliche and I know that it can become a rote exercise. But taking time to thank the Lord for your food is a wonderful habit to have and rote exercise or not, it teaches thankfulness, no matter what is being served.

Teach the Difference Between Needs and Wants:  Teach this concept and teach it early!  It is so easy for children to think that everything they desire is a need. 

Don't Fall Into the "Life is Fair" Trap:  Please don't try and make everything "fair" for each of your children.  This will cause stress and an unnecessary amount of work for you and it teaches your children an unrealistic concept. 

If one child is invited to a birthday party, don't expect them to all be invited.  If one child receives a gift from a grandparent, don't run out and buy something for all of the other children.  We want our children to grow up finding joy in the Lord, not in things.  Teach them to be happy for others.

My two youngest daughters went to a birthday party a couple of months ago and when they got home, they noticed that DD#3's goodie bag had more candy than DD#4's. DD#4 began to complain about hers not having as much, so my husband proceeded to take her goodie bag away, never to be seen by her again.  We, as parents, used this as an opportunity to teach her that life is not fair and the she should be thankful no matter what circumstances she is handed.

Show Them the World Around Them:  It is easy to get caught up in all we have and the way we do things and forget that we are just a tiny part of the beautiful world God created.  There are many ways to do this such as travel, mission trips, volunteer work, etc. 

We volunteered at a downtown crisis center as a family this summer and encountered people from many different ethnic, social and economical backgrounds. I don't want my children to see others with less and think "Oh we are so blessed!  They have so little and we have so much."  I want my children to learn to see others the way Christ sees them and be thankful for them because God made them.

There are people with much more than we have and there are people with much less.  The point is to find our joy not in things, but in the Lord and once you do that, it is easier to give thanks in all circumstances. 

Do Not Allow Unthankful WordsOur words have power to influence our heart and our heart influences our words.  When words of ungratefulness flow out, it is important to put a stop to them and investigate why they were there in the first place.  Is it a habit they picked up or a heart condition that you need to address?


Too often we fall into the trap of thinking we should teach our children to be thankful because we are so blessed materially, and, we are blessed for the most part.  Though we should be thankful for our material blessing, our thankfulness should not stem from them.  If it does, it becomes too easy to not be thankful when those things are taken away or lost.  We are called to be thankful in everything, in all circumstances. 

 
 
We only have to look around and see the goodness of the Lord in the trees, mountains, sunrise, and the wonderful works he does in others. This is how we can be thankful if we have a home to rest in each night, or a we live in a box.  Our thankfulness does not lie in what WE have or what WE do, but in what HE does!



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